The Universe Simply Can’t Seem to Kill Bruce Willis in the Trailer for Apex

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We could talk about how Apex, a Bruce Willis movie that seems to have come out of nowhere, combines elements from more movies than I can count on both hands, including but not limited to Logan’s RunHunger GamesThe Hunt, and every movie in which a criminal/hero is being hunted by a criminal/hero. Or we could talk about everything else in this trailer, which looks like a made-for-TV movie that Bruce Willis just stumbled into on his way home some random night. Why is he here? Why is Damien Darhk here? Why is Neal McDonough just so good at this kind of totally pointless egotistical bad guy role?

Why does Bruce Willis say he’s, and I quote, “bacon and eggs on Sunday morning”?

I can’t decide if that line is the high point of the trailer, or if it’s McDonough yelling “BRING ME THE HEAD OF THOMAS MALONE”? Or the point when the screen shows Malone’s stats and his nickname is “The Mutilator”? Or is it the inexplicable idea that the universe can’t seem to kill Bruce Willis? Was it trying?

One can only assume that Willis enjoys working with director/co-writer Edward Blake, as this isn’t their first movie together, nor will it be the last. Willis also starred in Drake’s Cosmic Sin, a sci-fi film about killing a bunch of aliens before they kill us (“Operation Cosmic Sin is a go”). According to IMDb, Willis will also be in Drake’s upcoming American Siege AND Gasoline Alley AND Paradise City, which Drake and his frequent writing partner Corey Large scripted, but will be directed by Chuck Russell (The Scorpion King).

The official plot of Apex is:

Serving a life sentence for a crime he didn’t commit, ex-cop James Malone is offered a chance at freedom if he can survive a deadly game of Apex. Six hunters pay for the pleasure of hunting another human on a remote island, but once Malone arrives all hell breaks loose. Laying traps and playing mind games, Malone tries to turn the tables and fight for his life and his future.

This movie arrives in theaters and on demand November 12th. If you watch it, please report back. There must be more delectable dialogue.

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